Now, it's time for....
Dark Chao Role-Playing Game Mission 16: Tequila Mockingbird

[our newest mission begins in the Dark Garden; everybody is watching TV]
[Dark changes the channel to BBC One]
All: HEY!
Shade: Wait. How do we have BBC One? We have the American channels.
Dark: We have ALL the channels.
Shade: Oh.
Dark: And it's time for Doctor Who! I wanna watch it!
Shade: Fine.... watch it, see if I care. I'm gonna go loiter.
[Shade leaves the garden]
Dark: ....what's "loiter" mean?
Flame: He's gonna go stand around. Apparently, it's against the law.
Dark: WHAT?! It's against the law to STAND now?!
Ade: Only in dangerous and business places. It's a perfectly reasonable--
Dark: AGAINST THE LAW TO STAND AROUND?! I'm going to go sue!
All: Sue WHO?
Dark: ......uh....... sue Sony! Yeah. They made me cry!
Ade: How did they make you CRY?
Dark: I don't know. I'm just gonna sue them!
[cut to a District Court]
[The Irritable Judge Bowser is talking]
SB: Who'd you get as our prosecutor?
Dark: I got the best one around. Mister Prower!
All: WHAT?!
Dark: Yeah! Apparently, he's been prosecuting since he was seven!
Ade: ...isn't he eight, though?
Dark: So?
Ade: Never mind.
[Tails is here, prosecuting, uh......... Generic Sony Employee for "making Dark cry!"]
[the defense attorney is Generic Sony Employee Number 2!]
Bowser: Is everybody ready?
Tails: The prosecution is ready, your honor.
GSE2: The defense is ready, your honor.
Bowser: Good. Good. Mister Prower, if you will please inform us of the case.
Tails: Certainly.

Sony has been charged with poisoning children's minds with their PS3.

Ade: (to Dark) I thought they made you cry.
Dark: (to Ade) Eh, they wouldn't take the case. So, Mister Prower changed it up a bit.
Bowser: Generic Sony Employee, how do you plead?
GSE: Not Guilty!
Bowser: I see. Let's speed this up a bit. Give us your testimony.
GSE: Okay.

Well, this is the story all about how my life got flipped, turned upside-down.
I'd like to take a minute and just sit right there,
I'll tell you how I became the Prince
of a town called Bel-Air.

Bowser: Interesting. Generic Sony Employee number 2, you may Cross-Examine the witness.

Well, this is the story all about how my life got flipped, turned upside-down.
[HOLD IT!]
GSE2: You say your life got "flipped, turned upside-down?"
GSE: Yes.
GSE2: What do you mean by that?
GSE: My life went wrong.
GSE2: Oh. Continue.


I'd like to take a minute and just sit right there,
[HOLD IT!!!]
GSE2: I hardly think this will take one minute, sir!
Bowser: Pointless pressing. Witness, CONTINUE!


I'll tell you how I became the Prince
[HOLD IT!!!]
GSE2: You are a Prince?
GSE: Yes. I am the prince chairman of Sony.
All: WHOA!!!
GSE: Did it shock you?
GSE2: Quite. You may continue.


of a town called Bel-Air.
[HOLD IT!!!]
GSE2: "A town called Bel-Air?"
GSE: That is what we are calling the top headquarters at Sony now.
GSE2: I see. So, you are the prince of Bel-Air?
GSE: And I'm new at my job.
GSE2: Ah. So you're the FRESH prince of Bel-Air.
GSE: Yep.

Bowser: I see no need to continue this testimony. Do you, Mister Prower?
Tails: Um....


princes arent around anymore. he said town and THEN SAID SONY HEADQUATERS WAS BEL-AIR! 

SB: Objection!
GSE2: Hm?
SB: How in the world could you be the Prince of Bel-Air when you just started
GSE2: Hm....ACK!!
SB: And how did you become the Prince in the First place when, again, you just started
GSE2: ...
SB: And thirdly, what does Sitting down somewhere have to do with it? And Fouth of All, The case is about how your PS3 makes children's lives go wierdly! And Last, How did your life get flipped Up-Side Down when you just started huh? 


Tails: Um.... are princes even around anymore?
Bowser: Yes.
Tails: Oh. Where?
Bowser: Eastern countries.
Tails: Oh. All right, continue.
Bowser: So, Chairman man of Bel-Air, what can you tell us about the PS3 making children die?
GSE2: Cry.
Bowser: Cry?
GSE: Ah, the PS3.... I can tell you about it.

Witness' Account (The PS3)
GSE: The PlayStation 3 was designed with one purpose in mind-- comfort and utility.
[OBJECTION!!!]
GSE2: That's, uh.... that's TWO.
GSE: Whatever! "Comfort and utility" are what the PS3 was designed for! That's all!
Bowser: I don't see anything wrong with this one, do you?
GSE2: Nope.
Bowser: What about you, Mister Prower?
Tails: Um..... chao, help me out here!


Ade: *nervous* Um, objection!
Bowser: What?
Ade: Err..."Comfort and utility"? It's not supposed to give too...err...Smartness?
Everyone: ...


UR ROTTING PEOPLEZ BRAINZ. see?*holds up normal brain. and then a brain that has been using te PS3 and the brain is orange,with rotten egg smell. 

SB: OBJECTION! If this PS3 was based on Comfort and Utility, how come it makes children Cry!
GSE: ACK!
SB: And how can you sense Utility in your mind? ANSWER ME! 

U SAID COMFORT AND UTILITIY NOT COMFORT AND FUN IN FACT IT IS HORRIBLE! GSE:no itz not! oh yeah? guss wat i checked its programing and it was:horrible horrible horrible make kids cry dats wut it said! 

Ade: Can I ask, why comfort?
GSE2: Er.........
SB: And why Utility?
GSE: Um...
Dark: Cookies?
GSE and GSE2: ... 

[Tails finally wakes up after many months]
Bowser: Whoa! He's alive!
Tails: Urgh.... sorry. I, uh.... hibernated. Where were we? Ah, yes.
[OBJECTION!!!]
Tails: You SAY the PS3 was designed for comfort and utility, and yet it SUCKS!
GSE: ....ARGH! You're right!
Tails: So, Generic Sony Employee...
Dark: If that IS your real name!
Tails: ...care to tell us why you lied to us?
GSE: ...fine.

Why I Lied:
You see, my boss, the true director of Sony, he... he murdered somebody.
Particularly, he murdered Sonic the Hedgehog!
You might have noticed since people say Sonic's dead now.
The boss has been acting kind of weird lately.
When we made the PS3, he placed a rabid squirrel in the processing chip,
and said we must advertise the "comfort and utility."

GSE: ....I swear! That's what happened! I was simply doing my job!
Bowser: I see.... so, the boss is the true enemy here.
GSE2: Yes! I say we call him in, and he testifies!
Bowser: What about the Prosecution?

Should the boss testify?
Or was there a contradiction in the witness' testimony?


(sugi joins)
sugi, a neutral chao who wants to be a hero, main attribute: fly.

sugi: uh... what can I choose to do again?

me: ... she has a short attention span 


Tails: Welcome, Sugi. You're just in time to help us win this case!

Basically, the witness says,

"You see, my boss, the true director of Sony, he... he murdered somebody.
Particularly, he murdered Sonic the Hedgehog!
You might have noticed since people say Sonic's dead now.
The boss has been acting kind of weird lately.
When we made the PS3, he placed a rabid squirrel in the processing chip,
and said we must advertise the "comfort and utility.""

Tails: So now, they're gonna call the guy's boss up to the stand, but, I gotta get THIS guy declared guilty. Not the boss. We need to find something wrong with the guy's testimony. 

(Night joins)
Night - A hero fly-run chao, has all phonex parts, loves to tease Dark. Will burst into "flame rage" if angry. A.K.A.- Pyro 

(Buzz joins)
Buzz-a dark fly-run chao,playful,likes to mess around alot,mellow,has spiky teeth,and has telekenesis 

solar:*goes up to tails*if he murdered sonic,then why is sonic and the black knight out?and,why hasn't sega sued sony then? and,why hasn't it been on the news? 


Tails: CONTRACEPTION!
Bowser: What?
Tails: Sorry, I mean, OBJECTION!

The defendant claims that Sonic was murdered. But, I have incriminating evidence that he is NOT.

[on the touch screen, the player selects, "Box Art"]
Tails: TAKE THAT!
[the crowd goes, "GASP!"]
Bowser: Is that...?
GSE: It can't be!
GSE2: But, it is!
Tails: Indeed. Sonic and the Black Knight. People claim this game was NOT lame.
Bowser: You can bust a robust rhyme like locust, Mister Prower.
Tails: So, if there is a slightly not that bad Sonic game... HOW CAN HE BE DEAD?!
GSE: .....FINE! I admit it! The PS3 makes children cry! It's EVIL! RAAAAAAAH!
[the Generic Sony Employee faints]
Bowser: .....uh.... *bangs gavel* Order........? Um.... I think the Prosecution.... won.
GSE2: Urp!
[cut to the Dark Garden]
Dark: Well, we won the case!
Ade: Yeah, but you still can't stand around--
Solar: Ade.
Ade: Oh, right. Sorry.
[Shade comes back]
Shade: That sucks. Some cop arrested me for loitering.
Dark: What's "loitering" mean?
Shade: It means...
Ade+Solar: Shade, no!
Dark: WHAT?! You can't even STAND AROUND anymore? That's ridiculous! I'm gonna go sue!
Ade+Solar: Here we go again....
SEE YOU NEXT MISSION!