Dark Chao Role-Playing Game Mission 2: Slamma-Jamma Fighting League Losers!

[the first scene begins in the Dark Garden]
Shade: Okay, Seargent Dark Hawk... as Seargent, you can... I dunno.
[Dark comes running]
Dark: SHADE! Excuse me, King of Shadows...
Shade: Stop it with the Shakespeare references.
Dark: Well, there's this poster of a new fighting competition! See?
Shade: Hmm... yadda yadda, I don't care-- wait... "For Seargents and Up"... a-ha! Seargent Dark Hawk, sir... you wanted to know what Seargents do? They participate in contests for the Kings!
You: But, sir--
Shade: Shut up and go. You want new recruits, right? Then every time you beat a guy, dab this purple flower into his eyelids!
Dark: Pfft... and he says I make too many Shakespeare references...
Shade: Shut up. GO, NOW!

[the place is now the Battle Arena (made up)]

Announcer: Round 1 is the newbie Dark Hawk versus... the GOOMBA BRO-- uh... um... the... BAD...NIK.... BROTHERS.... yeah.
[defeat these two badniks, dab the flower into their eyelids, and they'll join the Darks]

okay...but im not sure the poison works on chao that arentbaby chao...but please stop call it purple flower because:
1)its not even purple, its red
2)poison sounds better than flower...
*changes purple flowers name to red poison*

any ways how will i beat them with magic of course 
*uses magic spell*
B-BRO1 gets tossed against the wallwith magic!
B-BRO1 hp is now 90/100
B-BRO2 attacks DH and ground pounds him!
DH is now 93/100
DH uses chaotic blast again B-BRO1!
B-BRO1'S hp is now 70/100
DH:this is easy*taunting voice*
B-BROS:oh rly? well u will c r greatest move!
{DH mind}:Man,i hate chao who talk like that >.>
*B-BROS TRANS FORM INTO:the chaotix chaotic robot HP 1000*
DH:holy crap.
DH:well i have a super power too!
*DH takes out the 3 sacred stones of fire,water,and rock and throws them in the air*
*DH zaps them with his and while in the air,as soon as they hit the ground they start glowing red*
*DH gathers them up and he starts glowing white*
*DH turns into mega-chaos-hyper-ruby-fire-monotone-ultra-twotone-moon chao HP:1001*

[the robots stare at the chao with the really long name, and explode]
[Shade calls you on some sort of cell phone]
Shade: You idiot! You were supposed to slip the pur--... red poision... into them! They'd be reprogrammed to join us! Now they exploded... great. Oh, watcher of the skies, please let the next battle be against the chao... (quietly) and stop me from making Genesis references...

Announcer: Iiiiiiiiiiiiiit's TIME! Time... for RRRRRRRRROUND 2! We have some intergalactic travelers here, say hello to the lord of dark matter itself... (NAME CENSORED FOR SPOILER REASONS)!!! Let's just call it... "It".

...How many Genesis references am I gonna MAKE, really? Wow...

[It smiles, but when it sees you, Its eyes disappear and Its mouth becomes one large, red eye]

I KNOW WHAT to do!
pokes it's red eye with a stick!
it's HP turns to 0/100!
DH: now where do i put the red poison...
*its mouth appears again*
ahh...*puts red poison in it's mouth*
*it turns into a cupcake!*
oops..wrong poison
*puts real red pioson in its mouth after he turns back*

Shade (cell phone): Congrats! We now have Zer--uh... number 2, on our team!
Announcer: Now, for Round 3, we make some Super Paper Mario references as the Duel Of 100 comes as one! By that I mean 100 warriors are all fighting you at once... for the boss of part 1. This contest has 3 parts, each part has 3 fights, and at the end, we make a DBZ reference as you need to fight ME, the Announcer!

[a tiny warrior walks up to you]
You: Awww.... wook at da widdle baby!
[the tiny guy kicks you in the shin]
You: ACK! Oof.... ow.
Tiny guy: Pwepawe to fight, big ****! 

why you little!
*Zaps tiny guy and he becomes hipnotized*
tiny guy: I forfeit!
DH:okay!*puts red poison in tiny guys mouth*
next round pointy hat guy!
P.H.G:I will get yo-
*anvil appears above him*
P.H.G: holy crap.
*anvil falls on him*
~conveniently his head is sticking out above the anvil with his mouth wide open~
DH:yay!*puts red poison in PHG'S mouth
(12 rounds later)
(putting red poison in flying pointy hat guy's mouth)
DH:okay will the rest of king sammer guy's guys come forward
*they come in the arena*
DH:I will fight you all!
*they all agree and start fighting*
DH:*uses magic* says magic spell:KINASIRU!
*they all collapse to the ground passed out*
okay!*puts red poison in all enemies mouths*
------------
DH'S checklist
+ means check
+ beaten all enemies
+ put red poison in there mouths
fight the announcer

Announcer: Wow! You are strong! So, your next fight is-- ME!? Um... uh... OW! Oh, my stomach! Ooh, I'm sorry, but y'know, stomach cramps and all that... hehehe... man, and I REALLY wanted to fight... see ya.

[END OF EPISODE (Surprisingly short one)]