The time and place is the Dark Garden, at the middle of the night.

Everyone is asleep, even Shade, awaiting his next big day!

For Shade, every day is a big day!

However, even during the night, evil lurks.

We switch to the Chao Transporter, where a shadowy figure slowly creeps towards it.

?: MUAHAHAHA! Heh.... I shall make sure that I get rid of Shade and his foolish friends FOR ONCE, AND FOR ALL!

The figure quietly activates the Chao Transporter, and accesses its databanks.

?: Hmmm... "Drop off," "Pick up," "Move," and..... what's this? WHAT IS THIS?

The figure takes a look at the final option in the menu, "Good-bye," and the camera slowly zooms in on it.

["zheeeeooooo" SFX, as the biggest Dr. Who-style intro begins, like last time]
LINK BROKEN, REMOVED

Dark Chao Adventures Episode 24: The Chao World


Chapter 1: Wake Up, Shade!
[cut to Shade, asleep]
[he wakes up]
Shade: (yawn) .......... ugh...... I'm feeling kinda tired this morning. Yo, DARK! What've we got to eat? I'm hungry!
[silence]
Shade: ...Dark? DARK? ....Devilish? That little green dude? Anyone?
[Shade looks around, only to see acres of trees]
Shade: ....this can't be good. Anybody? Am I all alone?
[silence]
Shade: I'll take that as a "yes..."
?: (whisper) Yesssssssss.....
Shade: Huh? Who's there?
[silence]
Shade: ...I'm scared. I wanna go home!
[Shade looks at a large tree, and sighs]
Shade: Looks like I'm gonna have to adapt. --What am I saying? I can't adapt! I'm Shade, the dependent guy! And I WANT MY MOMMY!
?: (whisper) ................................................................................ha...............
Shade: Wha? Who?
[silence]
Shade: ....I don't like this place. I don't like it one bit.
?: (whisper) Neither do I...
Shade: (pupils shrink) --maybe I should find somewhere ELSE to calm my nerves.
[Shade searches the forest, all while someone follows him]
Shade: Ah.... I think THIS place is perfect.
?: Tell me about it.
[Shade looks to his left and sees another grey chao]
Shade: WHOA! Who-who are you?
?: ...Uh.... well, um... you can call me "He..."
Shade: He? HE? What kinda sexist name is THAT?
He: Do you even know what "sexist" means?
Shade: ...............no. But, I assume it's the proper context! ...Whatever "context" means.
He: Assume? Come on, it's like the saying goes... "When you assume, you make an--" .....well, you know the saying.
Shade: No, no I don't. Do tell.
He: I'd rather not.
Shade: Why not? Are you scared?
He: Believe me, if we want to keep our PG Rating ON, and our butts OFF Chao Talk's "Top 10," I'd suggest shutting your YAP!
Shade: ....."Chao Talk?" What kinda 4th Wall-breaking freak are you? 'Cause I'm the casual kind.
He: I wasn't breaking the 4th Wall! I was referring to--.... don't you know?
Shade: No. No. Nope. Not at all.
He: You don't know about Chao Talk? ...Well, from the position you're in, I had assumed--
Shade: You know the saying!
He: ....of COURSE. You have more intelligence than I had thought.
Shade: Nice to know, ain't it?
He: ..............................(loudly) OH, THE IRONY!
[Shade slaps He]
Shade: Just TELL ME the saying!
He: Okey-dokey........ if you insist. Remember, kids, when you assume, you make an *** of Uma Thurman!
[suddenly, an alarm goes off]
He: --Crap. See? I told you I shouldn't have.
Shade: Why? What just happened?
He: Gee, kiddo, what, were you BORN yesterday or summin?
Shade: No. What's going on?
He: Just come with me! NOW!
[He grabs Shade and pulls him along as they run through the forest, and MEANWHILE...]
Chapter 2: Dark Days In the Mountains
[cut to Dark, waking up]
Dark: (yawn) ....Oh, boy, what a nap. It was nice. Oh, and I don't hear Shade awake yet, so I can do some private stuff!
[Dark pulls out some candy]
Dark: Sweet, SWEET candy... if Shade ever saw you, I'd never see you again!
[Dark starts eating candy, then stops]
Dark: WAIT A MINUTE.... this isn't the Dark Garden! And... that isn't chocolate! (pause) It's taffy! Anyway, this is some kinda mountain! This is not good.
?: Hey, you! Over here!
Dark: What? (looks around) Who's there?
?: Just a coupl'a Heroes. No need to worry.
Dark: NO NEED TO WORRY!? Don't you realize what I am?
other?: A very dirty hobo?
Dark: NO! I'm a Dark Chao!
?: And your point being...?
Dark: What kind of Hero doesn't hate Darks?
?: (whispering to other) This guy must be new. (to Dark) Just come over here!
Dark: O...kay.
[Dark steps behind a bush and sees two Heroes-- one Fly and one Swim]
Dark: (jaw wide open) ......................
Hero1: What? Oh, Hero Chaos-- don't tell me he followed us...
Hero2: (turns around) No, he didn't. (slaps Hero1) And stop using the Hero Chaos' name in vain!
Dark: You... you guys... you're....... you're WEIRD! You're.... purple... and.... green!
Hero1: What, haven't you ever seen Hero Fliers or Hero Swimmers before?
Dark: No... just... regular ones. I didn't even know there were ANY fly or swim guys.
Hero2: So you've never seen a mirror?
Dark: What are you talking about? And, uh... what are your names?
Hero1: I'm Purflee the second. And this guy is LGS, which stands for Luis Green Sumytumy.
LGS: That's Sumatuma! (slaps Purflee)
PF: And, uh... we said that 'cause of your arms.
Dark: What's wrong with my arms?
LGS: They're close to Power ones.
PF: Yeah. You need a few more levels with Red Chaos Drives.
Dark: I'M CONFUSED! What's going on!?
LGS: Purf! This guy was obviously a Fountaneer. Of COURSE he doesn't understand what we're saying!
PF: Of course... um... have you ever seen a (slowly) shiny red stick?
Dark: Yeah.... I touched a few of them, and felt stronger. Uncle Shadow brought them over as gifts one day from his trip to the jungle!
PF: Well, those shiny red sticks are called (slowly) Chaos Drives. The red ones are (slowly) POWER Chaos Drives.
Dark: I getcha, and I need a few more of these Chaos Drive things to be... a... Dark Power Chao?
LGS: Now you're getting it! You see, we got lots of (slowly) Swim and Fly Chaos Drives. I got Swim, Purf got Fly.
Dark: Ohhhhh.......... I think I get it now. But, where am I?
PF: Um... Dark Chao, I don't know how to break this to you, so I'll say it in a way that you'll need to figure it out on your own. You're a Fountaneer. What that means, you need to figure out yourself.
Dark: But... where am I?
PF: You're on Neutral Pass. It's a plateau in the middle of the Dividing Range, just past Intelligence Caves.
[Dark stands there for a while]
LGS: Lemme put it simply. (slowly) You're not in the Dark Garden anymore.
Dark: I'm NOT? Aw, man!
PF: Elgee, how'dja know he was in the Dark Garden?
LGS: I assumed.
Dark: But... what about the saying?
LGS: .................................................................................................Don't remind me.
PF: Guys... they're coming! Hurry, let's go!
[Purflee pulls Dark with him and LGS, meanwhile...]
Chapter 3: Heroes of the World!
[cut to Chao, waking up to the sight of Tail]
Tail: Oh, good, you're awake. Chao, we have a problem here!
Chao: Uh-oh, what? Did the Darks do something again?
Tail: I think so. Look!
[Chao looks, and gasps at the sight of a waterfall]
Chao: Oh, my...... it's beautiful! But... what's the problem?
Tail: We're not in the Hero Garden, and Knuckle, Speedy, Hero, and Aqua are gone!
Chao: Oh. That's not good. So, where ARE we, then?
Tail: How should I know?
Chao: Good question.
[the two notice a Dark Chao sphere behind a rock]
Chao: (whispering to Tail) Keep quiet. Maybe he won't notice us.
Darkchao: I can notice you. No need to worry.
[Tail squeals, and hides behind Chao]
Darkchao: What's wrong? He acts like he's never found a Dark Chao before.
Chao: Oh, he HAS. That's the thing; he's scared of Dark Chao.
Darkchao: Why? What's wrong with Dark Chao?
[Chao and Tail look at each other, suspicious]
Chao: Uh... nothing. What are you doing back there, anyway?
Darkchao: (trying to change the subject) Nothing. So, you guys aren't from around here, are you?
Tail: No. Where is "here?"
Darkchao: Uh... so, you don't know? K. You're in the Hero Falls. That right there is the main attraction, Mind Tractor.
Chao: What kind of name is... "Mind Tractor?"
Darkchao: That's one of those things best left unanswered. Like what I'm doing back here.
Chao: (suspiciously) What ARE you doing back there?
Darkchao: Nothing. Gimme a moment, I'll be out soon.
[Chao and Tail stare at the rock, disturbed]
Tail: ........... why is there--
Chao: --Perhaps it's best we DON'T know.
Darkchao: Hurrgh... almost done. Ah, there we go.
[the Dark chao steps up and reveals that he's a Run/Run chao]
Stalh: What up? The name's Stalh.
Chao: Stealth?
Stalh: Almost. Es-tee-ay-el-hayche. Pronounced "Stalth." It's Darkonjurf.
Tail: What is "Draknuyurgh?"
Stalh: (sigh) Dee-ay-ar-kay-oh-en-jay-yuu-ar-ef. Pronounced "DraknOyurgh," it's the language of where I come from.
Chao: Does... where you come from... have a strange name/pronunciation/spelling, too?
Stalh: Yeah. Darku.
Tail: Now, I don't wanna try pronouncing THAT.
Chao: We may as well learn it. How do you say that/spell that?
Stalh: Dee-ay-ar-kay. Pronounced "Gyichreenhuyuyuyuyumbevriklewquaa." But, that's OLD Darkonjurf, the NEW way to say it is "Drakular."
[Tail and Chao stare in disbelief]
Chao: I'd HATE to learn your name in old Darkonjurf.
Stalh: It's simply pronounced "Stall," the way it's spelled.
Chao: So, can you take us to Darku?
Stalh: Not "Draklear," you gotta say it the way Bush calls "Nuclear," "Nucular." "Dracular." Got it?
Chao: Okay, can you take us to Darku?
Stalh: Uh... no, I'm visiting Herotchiyughpuru.
Chao: HOW MANY PLACES HAVE WEIRD NAMES!?
Stalh: Come on, can't you say "Herotchi?" That's how you pronounce it. Herotchiyughpuru is the LONG name, they shortened it to "Herotchi" for convienience.
Chao: (sigh) Okay, could you take us to Herotchi, Mister Useless Dave?
Stalh: Sure! Follow me!
[Stalh takes Chao and Tail with him, and meanwhile...]
Chapter 4: Area 51 Break-In
[Metal arrives at Area 51, only to be stopped by a familiar person]
G: STOP!
MS: Hey... aren't you the guard from Hewewe?
G: Yeah... and you're Metal! Hey! Good to see ya!
MS: Good times, huh? Say, uh... I was hoping you could let me in, see... I've got to meet someone here.
G: Good times, of course! Say, uh... NO. I can't. I gotta guard this place.
MS: Really? Oh.......... okay, then.
[Metal finds a box and breaks in there, and goes to the center of the base]
MS: Hmm.... where is that thing I was told to meet?
?: (on intercom) Hello, Metal.
MS: Mecha? Mecha Knuckles, is that you?
MK: Yo. Uh... I'm the one Rouge told you to come see.
MS: Sweet! Say, uh... whaddya want?
MK: Uh... I'll tell you.... when you come to me. I'm two rooms East.
MS: Through the Screening Room?
MK: Uh, lemme check........ um.... yeah. Through the screening room.
[Metal goes into the screening room, where the door is locked]
MK: Welcome... TO THE SCREAMING ROOM!
MS: Riiiiiiight.
[Metal breaks through the door]
MK: What up? See, the thing I wanted to see you about was... YOUR DOOM.
MS: Yeah, well, I gotta get this thing checked at the doctor-- WHA?
MK: That's right, Metal. I gotta kill you. Why? I do not know. It's just... this is the DCA adaption of MSQ, and in MSQ, I was programmed to kill you, so... you know.
MS: Yeah, and in MSQ, I destroy you.
MK: (pupils shrink) Right. Yeah. Uh... see, could we, maybe... skip that part? You know, "let's not and say we did?"
MS: Right, about the skipping... "let's not and say we did."
MK: I knew you'd see it my wa--........doesn't that mean we're NOT skipping and saying we...
[Metal nods]
MK: ......did? .....Oh, blue blur.
[They say they skipped it]
[when the camera returns, Mecha is in a pile of rubble]
MS: That'll teach you to try and kill me! And to be made by someone who killed who I was trying to kill.
[pause]
MS: Wait, now what? Uh... lemme check MSQ again.... right here, I gotta use the "secret key"... which is one room WEST of the center. Uh... hehehe.... I'll be right back.
Chapter 5: The Legend Of Chao Talk (AKA "Portable Info Kiosk")
[we're back with Shade and He, who just ran into an all-chao Saloon]
Shade: (panting) What were we running from?
He: Don't you know? I mean... really?
Shade: Have no clue.
He: Where are you from, anyway?
Shade: Uh... the... Dark Garden.
[all the noise in the Saloon stops as everyone stares in disbelief at Shade]
He: You're KIDDING.
Shade: No.
He: Really? There is NO WAY you can be from there!
Shade: No, no, I'm DEAD serious. Really.
Randomchao: If youse is from da Dark Garden, why are ya HERE?
Shade: I'm wondering the exact same thing.
He: All right, look- the Dark Garden, to us, is heaven. It's like a legendary haven, but better. None of us have been there, but our ancestors HAVE.
Shade: Okay. I see. And... none of you guys know where it is from here, do you?
Crowd: (negative remarks)
Shade: (sigh) Okay. Just asking.
He: If you wanna know where you are... you're in... man, this is like telling an alien stuff... you are in Chao World.
Shade: I thought I was in the Chao World when I was in the Dark Garden...
He: No, no, you see, that's where you start to misunderstand. According to our ancestorial records, the place you were in was the Chao Ship. Do you remember a large, glass room with stars?
Shade: Yeah, that was the Chao Lobby.
He: That was the main body of the ship! The "Dark Garden" you remember... it was one of the life-containment chambers.
Shade: Okay, I'm starting to not believe you here. You're telling me that I'M an alien?
He: No, no, quite the contrary. You are as normal as us. It's just... uh... do you recall seeing a fountain as a baby?
Shade: No, but my parents told me stories of a fountain.
He: See now, that is the Fountain of Ruse. Every chao sees it as a baby. And I mean WAY back as a baby, new-born style.
Shade: Uh-huh.
He: The Fountain is something that we must conquer ourselves as New-Borns. Average Chao don't know much, so we crawl past it to the Chao World. Out there, we can't go back so easily. You see, a mystical fog enters our bloodstream, making us forget the path we took to get from the Fountain and out.
Shade: I'm starting to get you. So, I drank from the Fountain?
He: Now you're gettin' it. Non-average chao, those real smart ones, they know enough to drink from the Fountain. Drinking from it incases them in a pink cuccoon, transforming them into an egg. It also puts in two gases into their bloodstream: Pink and Forget.
Shade: "Forget" gas made me forget life as a New-Born, and the Fountain?
He: Yup. Exact-o-mundo. The pink gas allows you to reincarnate ONE MORE TIME. BUT, it only allows reincarnation when the gas is mixed with "loving cells," given by one of the six chosen guys. A blue hedgehog, a young fox, a red thing, a black hedgehog, an old hag, and a fat guy. Once one of those (or a combination) have given you "loving cells," it mixes with the Pink Gas and activates when you are about to die. It creates the same effect as drinking from the fountain, minus the Forget gas.
Shade: Ah! I get it! So, minus the Forget gas, I get more Pink gas, allowing me to reincarnate one more time?
He: Yeah, and that's all I know about the Fountain.
Shade: Okay..... anything else you got for me?
He: Uh... there's the Tale of Chao Talk, but that's little more than a fairy tale.
Shade: I see. Well, if you don't want to....
He: No, I want to. And I will. May as well inform you of this stuff NOW. *ahem*
Faraway, in a mysterious land, there used to be a magnificent city. It was called Chao Talk, for it was the world hub for everyone. Many important Chao lived there, and some people thought it would never go.
Yet, it did. One day, the "Turricane" came, which completely destroyed everything! The city was buried, and the few survivors migrated to the very corners of Chao World to build life up from scratch.
Still, some chao started spreading rumors about a city hidden from everyone. A city where life was much better, and everyone lived happy lives! A city... called... Chao Talk.
Shade: So.... this "Chao Talk" place......... uh........ what's so special about it?
He: Nothing. We just love fairy tales.
Shade: So, there's most likely no way for me to get back to the Dark Garden?
He: I was getting to that part. There is said to be a maze at one end of the city, where a teleporter lies at the edge. The teleporter is said to take you to the lair.... of the....... oh, I can't say it. Its name is too foul!
Shade: The teleporter takes me to a beast, I got it.
He: NO.... it is not a beast. It is.......
Shade: Yes...?
He: a........
Chapter 6: The Cave of Skulls
[cut back to Purf and LGS pulling Dark along with them, and they reach a small village]
PF: There... we should be safe now.
Dark: Where are we? And what is going on?
[LGS explains about the whole "Chao World" thing, and tells him about Chao Talk]
Dark: But... what were we running from? And where are we?
PF: We were running from the Dementez.
Dark: Uh..................?
PF: The Dementez are crazy chao who got lost in the Cave of Skulls!
Dark: Look, just tell me these things, 'cause I don't know much about this place. Okay?
LGS: The Cave of Skulls is just past this village, and is dark like you wouldn't believe. And not the kind of dark you like, either. The bad kind with the shadows and spooky noises, and insomnia!
Dark: Does it lead to anything?
PF: C'mon, Elgee! You know the Cave of Skulls isn't REALLY dark! And even YOU know the "skulls" part is just a myth.
LGS: Oh, no, it's not. Listen, Dark, you shouldn't enter that cave back there. It looks bright as day now, but anyone who spends more than a minute in there goes temporarily BLIND! The blindness doesn't go away until they are out of the cave!
Dark: But what about the "skulls" part?
PF: (sigh) I may as well tell him, since we're spreading rumors here. Dementez are sometimes called 'Skull Chao,' because when they leave the cave, they come out with a skull on their head! Nobody knows why, though.
Dark: I can go into the cave, no prob! ...But... where does it lead?
Both: Nobody knows...
PF: Some people say it DOESN'T END. Me? I say it has a dead end somewhere. No cave goes on forever!
LGS: Some people say it leads to the lost city of Chao Talk. I think so, too.
Both: And SOME say it leads to Hell!
Dark: Well, Hell is basically the Dark Garden, so I hope it goes the--
LGS: No, Dark...... here, Hell is completely different! I don't wanna describe it, but people say it is Chao Talk.
Dark: What is Chao Talk?
PF: Hell!
Dark: Now, why would they say that? I thought it was a cool place!
PF: I don't wanna tell you the OTHER rumors of Chao Talk, but I CAN tell you... some people went there last year.
[Dark slowly steps to the entrance of the Cave of Skulls, and PF and LGS quickly run to him]
LGS: What are you doing!? You heard what we said about this place!
Dark: I know... I just want to look at it.
PF: (to LGS) We should've told him the 4th wall reason of why it's called that.
LGS: You mean the Doctor theory? (PF nods) Now THAT's just a crazy story.
[Dark looks into the cave, and finds that he can't blink that well as he stares]
Dark: ..........wha?
[Dark sees a purple flaming skull, or what looks like one, as it quickly disappears]
Dark: ...
PF: Dark, you okay?
[Dark shakes his head, and looks back at the two heroes]
Dark: Yeah... I just thought I saw a skull in there.
[LGS looks at Purf with a grin, Purf is slightly embarassed]
[suddenly, Shade and He arrive at the Cave]
Dark: SHADE!
Shade: DARK!
[they hug]
Dark: Oh, it's so great to see you again! I thought I'd DIE before I saw you... HELP! I don't like this place.
Shade: Me, neither.
[suddenly, SShade and PFI appear]
PF: Sis'!
PFI: Bro'!
[they hug]
[Chao, Tail, and Stalh arrive]
[also, the rest of the chao arrive in groups]
LGS: Whoa... what's with everyone meeting up HERE?
Shade: Heh... I sent a flare.
LGS: ....In no way is that safe, but.... oh, well.
Shadow (chao): Where are we?
[Shade and Dark tell them the whole tale]
SShade: Well, "fate" brought us all here, so... we may as well go inside.
PF: Wait...... ah, FORGET IT. I'm coming, too.
[they all enter the cave]
Chapter 7: Inside the Cave
Dark: *cough* ...it's very DARK.
Shade: How many times do I have to tell you, Dark? Nothing is ever DARK, it's always SHADED! Heavily shaded!
[they keep walking, and some rustling is heard]
Shadow: Huh? Eep...
Speedy: Is it just me, or is this place scarier than I thought?
Shade: Is it just ME, or did Speedy just appear out of nowhere?
Tail: What's that supposed to mean?
Shade: It's just, y'know... we haven't seen many Hero Chao in a while.
Chao: I sent them to Hero Training.
Shade: Heh... NOW? I sent MY soldiers there YEARS back!
Hero: Guys, just SHUT IT, okay? Listen...
[they hear very slight music played on something like a musical box (y'know... sounds like eerie bells)]
PFI: What... IS that? Sounds like... "Forest of Illusion" from Mario World...
[everyone stares at her]
PFI: WHAT? Girls play Mario games, too!
PF: No, sis... it's not that...
PFI: What is it, then?
PF: Now, now... no need to panic... just DON'T TURN AROUND, WHATEVER YOU DO, 'kay, sis?
PFI: (nervously) W-what? Really, what?
Tail: (to Chao) Does that mean we'll never see her again?
Chao: (back) I don't know... but I think so.
PFI: (on the brink of crying) WILL SOMEONE PLEASE TELL ME WHAT'S GOING ON?
Shade: I don't know how to tell this to you, but... you have..... a SPIDER on your head.
PFI: Uh.... WHAT?
Shade: Heh, nah, I'm kidding, it's worse than that.
PF: J-just remain calm, sis... I promise that this won't be long... for you...
PFI: I thought it was just a spider!
Dark: Hate to break this to you, but... Shade only said that to keep you calm.
PFI: WHAT!?
Shade: Took you long enough to realize...
PFI: PLEASE, SOMEONE TELL ME WHAT IS IS!
PF: Sis, sis, SIS! You're panicking! DO NOT PANIC! Uh... and like I said, DON'T turn around!
PFI: (sigh) Oh, that's it... I'm turning around!
Everyone: NO!
[she turns around and sees a chao with a skull on his head]
PFI: That's it? A chao with a stinking SKULL on his head?
[she turns around to face them again]
PFI: I was sorta thinking it'd be some kinda MONSTER, like a BOO, ready to bite my stinkin' head off!
[suddenly, the Skull Chao turns into a giant Boo, and bites her head off]
PF: SIS! (sniff) I told her not to turn around... NOW SHE'S GONE! I only knew her for 3 minutes!
Dark: Actually, you knew her for just under one full page of writing.
PF: Now's NOT the time...
[the "Boo" disappears]
[the music plays again]
Knuckle: Isn't that funny, how the thing comes when the music stops?
[the music stops]
Shade: I hope it's coming for YOU, so you don't jynx us anymore!
[it does, and the music plays again]
Everyone: SHADE!
Shade: What? It's not like it's coming back, for someone like Speedy!
[it does, and the music plays again]
Everyone: SHADE! SHUT UP!
Shade: Don't worry, I know how get rid of it. It's NEVER gonna come back!
[it doesn't]
Shade: See?
Chao: Wow, the FIRST right thing you've done so far!
Shade: (sarcastically) Ha, ha, very funny.
[they FINALLY keep walking]
Chapter 8: Metal Mayhem!
[back with Metal in Area 51]
MS: Okay, I got the key, and am using it right now.
[the ground rumbles, and Mecha rises from the dust, and has all 7 emeralds (somehow)!]
MK: METAL! Now, in an event of DJay32-style randomness, I SHALL BECOME MECHA CONQUEROR!
MS: Mecha Whatnow?
MK: Uh... y'know... Metal Overlord, but me.
MS: Oh. Fine. Continue.
MK: RAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAWR!
[Mecha transforms and starts to destroy everything]
MS: Oh, now it's on!
[Metal jumps up and punches Mecha in the face]
[Mecha roars and smashes three random buildings]
[Metal was on one building, and falls to the ground]
MS: Wait a minute... the only reason I went on this quest was to get Eggman... where is he?
MK: Uh... um.... oh, gee.... I don't know.
MS: Oh, well, you know, I had assumed that you--
MK: Assuming will make one of us all, won't it?
MS: Yeah, yeah, it'll, I mean it'll... uh...
MK: Never lets go, does it? With the... and the--
MS: SHUT UP! Where's Eggman?
MK: Only I know where he is, and I won't tell you unless you defeat me.
[Metal grabs a rocket and throws into Mecha's left eye]
MK: OW!
[Mecha runs away to the nearby city]
[Metal follows, and goes into a hotel]
MS: HEY! I need something big.
Hotel Clerk: A pencil, sir?
MS: Nah, I need something REALLY HUGE. Titanic!
HC: I'm sorry, we don't sell ships.
MS: I'm serious, I need something BIG.
HC: Would you like a toilet seat?
MS: Okay, now you're just being silly.
HC: Fine, take this big thing I picked up last month.
[Metal tosses a Barney DVD at Mecha]
MK: AAAACK! The Kiddyness! It BUUUUUURNS!
[Metal jumps up and kicks Mecha]
[Mecha hits Metal with his... uh... tail (where'd he get one? Not too sure)]
[Metal finds a Home-Run Bat somewhere, and smacks Mecha into space]
[Metal then follows into space]
[Mecha unleashes some sorta beam]
[Metal dodges and fires some sorta missile]
MK: OW! Okay, I GIVE! Eggman's... in the Neutral Garden... behind the waterfall.
MS: What's he doing back there?
MK: WHADDYA THINK?
[Metal laughs]
MS: Okay, okay, I'm going.
Chapter 9: A Quick Recap
[back with the chao, they've been walking for hours]
Dark: Shade... where.... where are we?
Shade: I don't know.......... ugh... Chao, let's rest a bit.
Chao: Uh......................... what?
Shade: I said...... I... I said... let's rest a bit.
Chao: O.h.......k...a......y.....
[Chao collapses]
Tail: Should we........... should we do something?
Shade: Nah.... he's just..... tired. We're.... we're all tired...
[later, they're sitting and talking, and Chao's conscious]
Devilish: So I says to him, "Shader? I hardly KNOW her!"
[everyone laughs]
Hero: Hey, uh... how'd we end up here in the first place?
[everyone thinks]
Chao: Hmm... I... don't actually REMEMBER anymore.
Aqua: Did we... uh... did we die, or something?
Stalh: This is no Hell, that's for sure.
He: Hey, it's close!
[everyone laughs]
Shade: You know, I wonder where DJay is. I haven't heard from him in a while.
Dark: I have. I was in his quiz show just yesterday!
Me: I'm here. I'm the narrator, remember? You hear from me every time you see []!
Shade: Right, right... say, DJay? Uh... could you give us a quick recap of the story so far?
Me: Sure thing. Gather 'round! This may take a while...

It all started with Shade's idea of a stake-out in the Hero Garden. That went pretty well, until the Truth or Dare.
Shade's brother decided to visit a few days later. That did NOT go well. Especially for Dark.
The next day, Shade installed cable in the Dark Garden. The next few days were spent watching that.
However, the Chaolympics came and went, with Shade winning a great deal!
But, that was the last day of summer. School was starting, and Sonic decided to enroll the chao.
One weekend, Dark saved up some dough to get Sonic R, but went and messed everything up.
Then, a new student came to their class, and sent the chao to a faraway world filled with Poker!
The Poker Gang each took their "prizes," but the chao managed to escape.
Trouble stirred as the world was put in jeapordy because of Eggman's stupid attempts, Metal Sonic and Zim's, and then Eggman's again.

So, after quite a few days of peace and boredom in the Dark Garden, a GIRL came for the first time in history!
Then, the evil demon Mephiles came looking for Metal and Zim, but left with a new enemy-- the chao.
The next day, Mephiles cursed the chao, trying to put them out of their misery.
During the same day, he kidnapped Tail, forcing the others to go to his rescue.
Then, the second weekly Poker Game came and passed, ending in an epic dogfight in the skies.
The next day, trouble brewed when Shade and Chao came across a time machine, and found out what they shouldn't have.
That day continued as they returned with the others, and Shade was the only one left.
Finally, Shade teamed up with Metal Sonic to stop a living Resident Evil!

Hangovers, it seemed, when everyone woke up in the Stardust Eggman. They took turns telling what they think happened.
Returning home that day, people found a new online game, and quickly became addicted.
The next day, a field trip goes awry when the newly formed Beta Avengers come and cause trouble!
So, the following day, life has become a sit-com. Like real sit-coms, this "episode" didn't seem to last.
Then, the biggest day came to the chao-- Shade and Chao teamed up for the first time and solved crimes!
As the day continued, the Dark Garden flooded, and Shade was EXTERMINATED.
At the end of the day, an epic battle between good and Beta occured as Chao avenged everyone.

Of course, YOU'D wanna rest after all that, right? So, our "heroes" slept, eagerly awaiting their next adventure!
But... trouble still followed them... and an old enemy with a vengence decided to finally have his revenge!

Shade: Yeah, THANKS. (quietly) Show-off.
Me: Anytime.
Dark: Well, THAT certainly took up the entire Chapter!
Shade: That's what I meant.
Chapter 10: Running and Jumping
He: Well, I'd say you're all ready to move.
Chao: Yep.
Shade: No more collapses?
Chao: Nope. Let's go.
[they continue walking through the DARK, SHADED, haunting cave of skulls! One wrong move, and they could be breathing through a tube! You never know what's around that corner... could be a--]
Shade: OKAY! We get it, show-off! Shut up!
Dark: (shudder) Shade, could there REALLY be monsters in here?
Shade: Of course NOT! He just likes to exaggerate! (grim face)
[they walk, and walk, and walk, when suddenly]
SCREEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEECH!
SCRAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAH!
All: AAAHHHHH!
[they run as fast as they can, trying to get to the other end of the cave]
LGS: How are we even sure there IS an end to this cave?
The younger ones (and Dark): AAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHH!
Tail: I WANT OUTTA HERE! I WANT OUTTA HERE! SOMEONE SAVE ME!
Chao: Calm down, Tail... we'll get outta here... (sniffle).... (quietly) Help us, PLEASE.
[Shade looks behind them, and sees some sort of mutated bird following them]
Shade: AAAAAAH! IT'S RIDLEY! HE'S BACK FROM THE DEAD!
[they run as fast as they can, and SMACK! They hit a wall]
He: (cunningly) Touche, DJay... but I know you'd never truly KILL us... you just don't have it in you, DO you?
Me: (also cunningly) Try me.
He: Any threat either has a ridiculous weak point, or an easy way to heal us.
Me: (nervously) Um... not this one.
[He steps up and approaches the bird, without a sign of fear]
[the bird shows fear, and backs away with every step He takes]
Shade: Huh? (notices what's going on) This is for S.BONIC!
[Shade charges to the bird, which runs off, scared]
Me: Nicely done, you guys. Now, GET OUTTA THE CAVE!
Dark: Right.
[they go back to screaming and running]
Shade: What's that?
[Shade sees a bright light ahead]
Shade: Guys, a bright light! It's gotta be the way out!
[it is, and they run-- then quickly stop]
[except Dark, who keeps running, and SPLASHES right into a large lake]
[quickly, he swims back up to the others]
Shade: Heh... idiot.
Dark: Shut up.
PF: Well, Elgee, you're the one who got Dark interested in the city, YOU tell us what we have to do.
LGS: Okay, FINE, I will! Uh... lessee... OH! Look! Across the lake! Can you see it? That's GOTTA be Chao Talk!
[it's true, there's a big city on the other side of the lake]
Dark: YES! Now we can FINALLY enjoy casa paradiso, and make it back home!
Shade: Wait... how do we cross the lake?
Chao: Hmm... Dark, when you were "enjoying a swim," how deep was it?
Dark: Deep? Uh... well, my feet could touch the floor. What does that mean?
[Shade and Chao pass unamused glances, and prepare to wade]
Stalh: Hang on... how are we sure this is safe? In my vilhato (village in Dark language), we had a lake. It seemed shallow until we actually tried walking through it!
Tail: We'll need someone to test it...
[everyone looks at Dark]
Dark: What?
[they push him into the water]
Dark: Hey, guys, it's shallow!
[he steps back out, and a giant sea serpent rises from the lake (the lake wasn't shallow, he was just standing on the beast)]
Dark: Let's go! ....what?
Chapter 11: Fighting the Serpent
Dark: Ho...ly.... CRAP!
[the serpant dives at the patch of land the chao are standing on]
[quickly, they all jump to the water]
Devilish: Hang on... I know how this works! It's another one of DJ's tricks! HEY! YOU! I AIN'T SCARED OF YOU!
[the serpant eats him]
[Shade quickly manages to swim to the other side]
Shade: GUYS! OVER HERE!
[Chao makes it]
[SShade makes it]
[everyone makes it except Dark]
Shade: DARK, C'MON!
Dark: I can't! I could never swim!
Shade: YES YOU CAN!
Dark: No, I can't!
Shade: Yes!
Dark: No!
Shade: Uh-huh!
Dark: Nu-uh!
Shade: Dark, you couldn't ever swim and you know it!
Dark: SHADE, I SO CAN SWIM!
Shade: Well, you'd never make it to this side of the lake!
Dark: Oh, REALLY? Watch this!
[Dark swims to the other side of the lake]
[the serpant prepares to eat them all]
Shade: Looks like this is it...
Dark: Oh, REALLY? I REFUSE to believe that.
[Dark tunes a guitar]
Shade: Dark, now's not the time for Genesis!
Dark: I'm not playing Genesis!
*a-hem* 
Beware of the time as it moves along...
Takin' you back always feared and strong...
Like the rush of wind it goes on and on and on and on.............
He's the fire, flame, the cryptic pain, an untouched crush will remain.
One, two, three four....
Headed straight for an open door!
He can see he can feel without one touch it seems unreal but it's true!
The power lives inside of you - inside of you, YEAH!!!
[the serpant stops, and looks confused]
Shade: Dark, PLEASE don't play the chorus...
Dark: Okay.

Beware of your mind as it proves you wrong...
A forward push, you gotta strike strong...
Like the rush of wind he moves on and on and on and on............
He's the tower, power, admits no shame, a judged crush will remain.
One, two, three four....
Headed straight for an open door!
He can see what he can't feel without one touch it becomes so real but it's true!
The power lives inside of you - inside of you, YEAH!

[skip chorus]

Beware of your mind as it proves you wrong
A forward push, you gotta strike strong
In this world, HIS WORLD...

[guitar solo]
[skip chorus]

Beware of your mind as it proves you wrong
A forward push, you gotta strike strong
In this world, HIS WORLD...

[piano, then END]

[the serpant eats them anyway]
He: Good thing I always carry grenades with me!
[the serpant looks nervous, then quickly spits them out]
Chapter 12: To Be Out of the Train Station
Shade: Great job pretending to have grenades, He! You sure scared that monster!
LGS: Hey, remember? We made it? So, stop the idle chit-chat! See, Purf? Toldja it existed!
PF: Yeah... you sure showed me.
[the first building was a train station, and they entered it]
Shade: Well, hardly what I'd expect from a city of LEGENDS...
[it's a short, dark corridor]
[they slowly step forward and enter the next door]
[it's a small, well-lit room with a bench]
Shade: Well, isn't THIS exciting?
LGS: Shut up.
[they keep on going, and hear high-pitched moaning]
PF: I dunno much about Chao Talk, but I'm pretty sure that's not supposed to happen.
Shade: Hey, maybe it's just our imagination.
[they keep on going, and reach a dark corridor, with a few lights]
He: Hm?
[He sees a crowbar on the ground, and picks it up]
He: Hey... look! That wall's a little... weird.
Chao: Yeah... there's a slight outline around these bricks!
He: Lemme see what's behind 'em..
[He whacks the bricks with his crowbar, and it reveals a secret passageway]
Chao: WOW! ...Uh... someone go and check what's back there.
[everyone looks at Dark]
Dark: Aw, man!
[Dark crawls through it, and it's pitch black, then he falls into another room]
[this room is nice, peaceful, and bright]
Dark: GUYS! Guys, can you hear me?
Shade: YEAH! Yeah, we can hear you!
Dark: It's safe! C'mon in!
[one by one, the others come in]
Tail: Wow... it's like we're in an observatory! Except with no telescope, and a REALLY big window!
Chao: No, no, more like a nice little place to relax...
[He walks around, eyeing the mysterious frames on the wall]
PF: What is it, He?
He: These frames are weird... look at them. Just... a frame with nothing but black in the picture spot.
PF: Yeah.. and they're "decorating" the room.
He: There's gotta be a secret to them.
[He whacks a random one with his crowbar, and the black turns into a picture of a robot]
All: WHOA!
Shade: Dark, you got it, too?
Dark: The funny voice in my head? Yeah!
[the voice said "The secret admin passage is open!"]
Hero: Secret Admin Passage? I don't see any pas--
[Hero notices a little passage to a blue room]
[above the blue room is a sign that reads "Admins ONLY!"]
Shade: Why do I get the feeling that we're wanderers in a city of almighty puzzles our minds are too small to comprehend?
Dark: Are you calling me dumb?
[Hero steps toward the passage, and the others follow]
[inside the room, it's simply a teal room with a big rod coming out of the ceiling in the middle of the room]
[on the end of the rod is a button]
Hero: Someone's gonna have to press it.
Shade: I'll press it, lazy bums!
[Shade presses it, and the chao quickly run to the edge of the room as it goes up]
Stalh: Okay, now we'll need someone to test to see if it's safe to go back.
Dark: (sigh) Okay, I'll go.
[Dark slowly steps into the middle, and instantly falls through the floor]
Shade: DARK! I'm going in after him.
[Shade runs in]
[everyone else just stands there]
Chao: SO... 'ja catch Smallville last night?
Tail: Tivo'd it.
Stalh: Oh, COME ON! Two of your pals jump down a mysterious chute, and all you can do is recite references from a short, yet insanely funny, HALF-LIFE 2 COMIC? I was expecting better from you.
[Stalh jumps down the chute]
[everyone else does, except Tail]
Tail: Concerned wasn't THAT short...
[Tail jumps down the chute]


Now, for CREDITS!
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Dtw8oPoDkX8

Yeah, that's TOTALLY DCA credits. Of course.

Chao Talk is completely unoriginal, the name is based off a forum, the actual city's content is based off a series of Sven Co-op maps made by Turrican. The series is called "secretcity" .

To Be Continued... IN SEASON 4!